Banana Moments: Eating Disorder Recovery Realizations
When you are struggling with an eating disorder, it’s easy to feel like you’re not “sick enough” to deserve support or treatment. In a world steeped in diet culture, it’s even easier to underestimate how deeply your struggles run and believe you are someone who just “diets” or someone who “eats clean”.
As a therapist, I often sit with clients who come into my office describing “body image issues” or “struggling with my weight.” After talking with them, I sometimes assess that what they are experiencing is actually disordered eating.
Often, I recognize this long before they can see it themselves. A big part of our work together is bringing awareness and compassion to the part of them that is hurting.
My Personal Journey of Realization
As I was reflecting on this process with my clients, my mind went back to my own journey recognizing my eating disorder.
For me, it was a banana.
That was the moment I knew I had a problem.
It’s almost funny to think of it now because, at sixteen, I was already seeing a therapist, a dietitian, and a psychiatrist for a diagnosed eating disorder. On some level, I knew something was wrong but a big part of me didn’t know, or didn’t want to know.
The Power of a Banana
I was sitting on the couch in my dietitian’s office one afternoon when she recommended adding a banana to my breakfast.
Immediately, my chest tightened, and tears began to roll down my face. It was just a banana, but to me, it felt like she had asked me to do something incredibly dangerous. My hands went cold and my vision narrowed.
I remember staring at the pattern on her floral pants as fear surged through my body.
It felt so silly: it was just a banana. But in that moment, I couldn’t deny the truth anymore:
my eating disorder was very real.
Two Parts of Ourselves
When I work with clients, I often see two parts within them:
The Caretaker – the part that knows you need help, support, and treatment.
The Protector – the part sitting deep in denial, whispering, “Maybe it’s not that bad,” or, “I don’t think I’m sick enough to need treatment.”
Both parts exist for a reason. The caretaker moves you toward healing, while the protector tries to keep you safe by minimizing the problem.
Moving Toward Recovery
Taking the first steps toward recovery means fully acknowledging that your struggles with food and your body are real.
Allowing yourself to believe you are deserving of support, treatment, and healing can be a life-changing moment in your eating disorder recovery journey.
Have You Had a "Banana Moment"?
Sometimes, clarity comes in a small, unexpected way; like a single piece of fruit.
Have you had a “banana moment” when you finally realized your relationship with food needed attention and care?
If you’re ready to begin your journey toward recovery, I’m here to help.
Schedule a free consultation to see how we can work together to bring healing and balance back into your life.
